Pavlov-wise, anything of an erotic nature is going to tend to lead to obsession. It's as simple as A-B-C; if something feels good, you will try to repeat it. The repetition reinforces the association of that act with pleasure, and there you are: obsessed.

This is the simple psychological explanation for a lot of things in your life and even more in mine. If you read a lot of romance and/or erotica, this is why (and it's why I like to write both). It's also why many of us have folders full of images on our computers labeled "Robert Pattinson" or "Peter Petrelli." It explains our hobbies, where we expend our free time, how we rank our priorities, and so on. And sometimes, you and I ask ourselves, "Am I obsessed?"

Depends on who you ask. If you buy another six romances a week and devour them all right on time, that won't seem peculiar at all to a typical fellow romance reader. But a guy who does all his reading on political blogs on the Web is going to find it unfathomable. I'm sure my constant blogging about House, M.D. and Neil Gaiman causes no concern among fans who share my passions. But I do try not to overly annoy those people who think House is annoying and off-putting, or simply don't enjoy the work fantasy writers.

Yes, I'm one of those Polite Obsessors. Which I suppose is a notch up from the Rude Obsessors, who can't talk about anything but the one thing currently fascinating them. And probably two notches up from people stalking Hugh and Neil. So I guess I should breathe easy, right?

Well, I find that obsessors of most types worry about their being obsessed no matter how polite they are about it. Over the years I've gotten plenty of emails from people seeking my advice on the subject (I suppose since I'm so clearly one of them!). They are ashamed of their folder of photos of Robert Pattinson. They fear they are spending too much time writing Peter Petrelli fan fiction. In one way or another they are creeping themselves out.

I could give the standard advice, that as long as your obsession isn't interfering with your responsibilities, relationships, and sense of well-being, you're fine. But I think that answer is a little pat. Because in life, anything with erotic (or romantic) content is probably going to have at least some effect on your responsibilities, relationships, and sense of well-being. It's just powerful stuff. And all of us want it, need it, to some extent in our lives, enough so that it's worth a bit of a trade off.

Sure, you could be spending the time you watch and rewatch episodes of "Lost," or "Grey's," or the scene when House and Cameron kiss, in some more useful way like volunteering at a soup kitchen. You could read romances only half the time you've been spending, and use the time you save to read the classics or learn Russian. But all work and no play makes Jill lose her zest for life, and I think there's a more important principle to apply here.

Everyone goofs off, everyone wastes time. Some might say that half hour you blew Googling Joshua Jackson is a tragic waste committed by someone obviously obsessed. But better you did that with your half hour--gleaning some minutes of true happiness--than you spent it sucked in to some stupid shopping site by a pop-up ad.

Rather than worrying about our obsessions, I think we all should recognize them as opportunities for happiness. Sure, you need to apply my favorite rule for life: Moderation in All Things. When it starts to feel undeniably obscene, cloying, tedious, annoying, or guilt-inducing, it's time to back off. But if your only concern is that some other person, were he or she to examine your life, deem your interest "too obsessive," that's a worry you might as well set aside.

So I let myself blog, probably more than I should, about House and Gaiman, Les Stroud and my various other crushes and obsessions. I figure, my readers can always skip those if they're really sick of the subjects. And in the meantime, I'm having just a super good time being a little obsessed.

Diana Laurence is the author of the Soulful Sex anthologies of erotic romance fiction, and the vampire romance Bloodchained (www.bloodchained.com). Diana's works are published by Living Beyond Reality Press (www.livingbeyondreality.com.)
Visit her at www.dianalaurence.com or enjoy her blog at www.eroticawithsoul.blogspot.com.